It has been a while since I added to my Jossipedia dictionary (of my wonderfully creative made up words.)
I watched a really eye opening documentary last night.
I say eye opening because yes, going into it I was like wow this is Bull shit.
Seeing the misogynistic titles in the beginning I thought, why even continue watching this crap...
But by the end of it, the message was clear and in line with the wonderful documentary I saw the other night (see last post), King in the Wilderness.
You cannot defeat the enemy by becoming the enemy.
One form of injustice, does not make up for another injustice. Two wrongs do not make a right.... I can go on...
The bf has always brought up the "other point of view" in any of my statements, which can be kinda exhausting and I chalked it up sometimes to him just wanting to antagonize my view points.
But I hear him now.
I believe this holds true now ever more.... where media has a huge impact on how we view things, and then the huge social pressure that comes along with it.
You have to reallllllllllly learn to discern the minute yet strong messages out there and say - is it fair?
In learning how people respond to being hurt, there is not one correct way of doing so. We must be careful to not dismiss and invalidate the hurt they feel. But we know one response to being hurt can be more productive than the other. Especially in our ever polarized society.
At the moment I am on a binge of just empathizing, learning the experiences of other people. And I am not finished yet, nor may ever be, but my new word/ phrase has come about from this.
ready for it.......
Inclusivism Censorship
It's a phrase I guess. I'm just stepping back right now and admiring my creation of a new term hahaha.
wait...
Inclusivity Censorship.
Maybe that sounds better.
Kinda wordy.... well that's what I came up with.
This is what is happening. This term to me is negative. It further divides. And damages full respect and equality of human rights.
I feel that this is important to avoid for any movement. Even in line with the late Martin Luther King Jrs views on collaboration and Unifying everyone. Instead of dividing. His rejection of violence and rejection of the term Black Power. The outcome desired is equality, but the means to the way can instead increase division and cause more harm. When movements are not inclusive. Black Power is the opposite of White Power. But how does it unify people, humans? Isn't that what we want? (Please watch King in the Wilderness).
Anyhow the documentary is called The Red Pill (Different from the movement group called the red pill - eek)
The producer also has a Ted talk : Meeting the Enemy ....but I suggest just watching the movie before the ted talk.
It's sad when we can no longer hear each other out. Even within families. Us or them. Yes or no. With no one listening to the other side. Divisions growing and families and friends divided.
No one questioning if their stance is unifying. It's just become a competition of us and them.
To me, if you find yourself on one end of the polarized spectrum, you are not fighting for unity, you are fighting for your self.
Monday, 8 June 2020
Sunday, 7 June 2020
Love via MLK jr
"You cannot defeat the enemy by becoming the enemy"
So key. One can miss it if they don't pay close attention.
"this one young lady came up to Dr. King, just spitting in his face, calling him all kinds of names. And he said You know, you are much too beautiful to be so mean. And when we came back through there, she came out through the crowd again and came up to him and said I'm sorry, I never should have been so rude."
Love.
Just watched King in the Wilderness 2018 . A movie so worth watching.
So key. One can miss it if they don't pay close attention.
"this one young lady came up to Dr. King, just spitting in his face, calling him all kinds of names. And he said You know, you are much too beautiful to be so mean. And when we came back through there, she came out through the crowd again and came up to him and said I'm sorry, I never should have been so rude."
Love.
Just watched King in the Wilderness 2018 . A movie so worth watching.
Tuesday, 2 June 2020
Validation
Do not invalidate someone else's experience just because you have not experienced the same. Or even if you feel you have experienced similar, do not invalidate the pain that it has caused them, just because you handled it differently. Maybe you cannot fix it, but the willingness to try or even just to listen and allow them to be heard can make all the difference. Empathy and understanding.
I remember my Gr. 11 Algebra teacher, Mr. Manning. Every time after an exam he would hand out our papers, go over the answers and then have the rest of the class to talk about life.
He opened up the topic to us to choose or whatever was happening in the news at that time.
I liked these conversations a lot because we got to know each other on a different level. In Highschool you had your cliques and you had stereotypes and assumptions of the classmates due to these cliques.
Like "Oh he is just a dumb jock and does not think too much about anything else but sports" or "she is the quiet nerd and had nothing else to say about life issues other than talking about the books" or whatever else we assume because we do not know them personally.
Well these conversations often got us thinking about the bigger picture in society and allowed people to open up about the variety of opinions on a topic without being judged and allowed us to be heard.
Mind you some of the people in class thought it was waste of time, or a silly distraction, or they focused on why are we talking about Seinfeld again? There was always a bonus question about Seinfeld at the end of each exam paper.
One particular topic was that of racism.
With all that was said among classmates on every different angle Mr Manning said this which somehow stuck in my head. I believe it was after a classmate said "yea I understand what they are going through, but.."
"No matter how anti-racist you feel you are or how much you try to understand and empathize with someone who is black, no matter how many good friends you have that are black or people you know that are black , even if we could somehow change the colour of our skin for a day or more and live in their shoes, no matter how hard we try to understand or even say we understand.... we will never ever understand how it feels like to be black. Or any other race which can be targeted for racism. You will never understand how to it is be be born black and grow up black. The best we can do is try to understand and be more conscious about it. But we can never say we fully understand what black people go through."
Listen so people can be heard.
I remember my Gr. 11 Algebra teacher, Mr. Manning. Every time after an exam he would hand out our papers, go over the answers and then have the rest of the class to talk about life.
He opened up the topic to us to choose or whatever was happening in the news at that time.
I liked these conversations a lot because we got to know each other on a different level. In Highschool you had your cliques and you had stereotypes and assumptions of the classmates due to these cliques.
Like "Oh he is just a dumb jock and does not think too much about anything else but sports" or "she is the quiet nerd and had nothing else to say about life issues other than talking about the books" or whatever else we assume because we do not know them personally.
Well these conversations often got us thinking about the bigger picture in society and allowed people to open up about the variety of opinions on a topic without being judged and allowed us to be heard.
Mind you some of the people in class thought it was waste of time, or a silly distraction, or they focused on why are we talking about Seinfeld again? There was always a bonus question about Seinfeld at the end of each exam paper.
One particular topic was that of racism.
With all that was said among classmates on every different angle Mr Manning said this which somehow stuck in my head. I believe it was after a classmate said "yea I understand what they are going through, but.."
"No matter how anti-racist you feel you are or how much you try to understand and empathize with someone who is black, no matter how many good friends you have that are black or people you know that are black , even if we could somehow change the colour of our skin for a day or more and live in their shoes, no matter how hard we try to understand or even say we understand.... we will never ever understand how it feels like to be black. Or any other race which can be targeted for racism. You will never understand how to it is be be born black and grow up black. The best we can do is try to understand and be more conscious about it. But we can never say we fully understand what black people go through."
Listen so people can be heard.
Friday, 29 May 2020
Chaotic heart breaking month.
May was a very difficult month.
I think it is showing on me both physically and in my temperament.
My patience and tolerance to certain things has run thin. I'm constantly trying to regroup and deep breathe, but it is hard to practice mindfulness and catch myself when plonked in the middle of inhumanity. (and stupidity and selfishness).
My frustration and shock at other peoples actions, makes me want to act inhumane as well, to lose my temper, to scream, to curse, to be short with others, to scold, to be reckless, to want justice by more terrible means, to say f* it to all! That's the danger of this all.
I was thinking today during my short drive to work this morning that "Times like these, it brings out the good in people and also the bad" The extremes.
I guess knowing this and seeing it around me, I should choose which side of those extremes I want to be on.
To be honest it can feel really difficult to choose sometimes. Its hard to be an empath and notice the callousness and selfishness in others, its hard to be in a profession that is out there to help people when there are so many people out there who just care about themselves. I have no words for the acts of violence I see, or for the heartlessness I have heard from people's mouths.
And for the Stupid people out there, I wish it was as simple as to just sit back and let Darwin's survival of the fittest work its course.... But you know what? The stupidity of others affects everyone. And Survival of the fittest does not eliminate stupidity, without taking out the innocent.
So much is happening these days. From personal losses of loved ones to murders and to protests of basically people that think its ok to murder the vulnerable and call it their "rights". Then there are those that are so self absorbed they are immune to even acknowledge or respect the life of someone who passed.
"Look for the helpers." I have heard, in times of chaos, sadness or trouble or catastrophes.
Yet I see selfies and bystanders who do nothing.
I see posts of long explanations of "its not about you" and this is why you should wear a mask. And though I agree, I think ..............but to "them" it IS and will always be about them, not others, that is the key reason for a lot of the madness. It is simply all about themselves. We all know you cannot fix stupid. And yet here we are, wasting our explanations and pleads. Never before have I realized that "helping others" can put me and my loved ones at risk, and some of the others I try to help really do not give a crap about me or my loved ones.
Twightlight zone much?
This month really sucked.
I have hope for everything and everyone. But I feel we are living in the extremes at the moment. And its easy to get sucked into the chaos and madness with my anger for the injustices and heartlessness.
A few weeks ago I had a talk with one of my cousins. She is an elementary school teacher here in T.O. She was prepping her students for Confirmation.
She talked about the 7 Deadly sins/ vices. I think many religions and philosophers have their own version, I think even Mahatma Gandhi has his own.
But for now the Christian version or Catholic version is what she reminded about.
Here is a list and the counteracting virtues.
Pride Humility
Envy Admiration
Anger Forgiveness,
Sloth Zeal, Diligence
Greed Generosity
Gluttony Temperance
Lust Chastity
I found it so interesting to look at any situation and distinguish what was the main vice involved. We talked more about pride and how it can be the root of all breakdowns in relationships.
If anything, the chaos of this pandemic and the craziness of this month has confirmed and help define what it means to be human....and separates those that are truly humane... apart from those that are of the surface, or only of themselves.
Ahhh, in this moment of mindfulness after my venting and with the terribleness of this month I still have seen the huge hearts of many and I am truly grateful. Like the life raft that keeps me afloat in this sea, I have a clearer vision of who I like to surround myself by.
----------------------------------
May the generous lights of this world, Tita HHD and EBR, rest in His Love.
I think it is showing on me both physically and in my temperament.
My patience and tolerance to certain things has run thin. I'm constantly trying to regroup and deep breathe, but it is hard to practice mindfulness and catch myself when plonked in the middle of inhumanity. (and stupidity and selfishness).
My frustration and shock at other peoples actions, makes me want to act inhumane as well, to lose my temper, to scream, to curse, to be short with others, to scold, to be reckless, to want justice by more terrible means, to say f* it to all! That's the danger of this all.
I was thinking today during my short drive to work this morning that "Times like these, it brings out the good in people and also the bad" The extremes.
I guess knowing this and seeing it around me, I should choose which side of those extremes I want to be on.
To be honest it can feel really difficult to choose sometimes. Its hard to be an empath and notice the callousness and selfishness in others, its hard to be in a profession that is out there to help people when there are so many people out there who just care about themselves. I have no words for the acts of violence I see, or for the heartlessness I have heard from people's mouths.
And for the Stupid people out there, I wish it was as simple as to just sit back and let Darwin's survival of the fittest work its course.... But you know what? The stupidity of others affects everyone. And Survival of the fittest does not eliminate stupidity, without taking out the innocent.
So much is happening these days. From personal losses of loved ones to murders and to protests of basically people that think its ok to murder the vulnerable and call it their "rights". Then there are those that are so self absorbed they are immune to even acknowledge or respect the life of someone who passed.
"Look for the helpers." I have heard, in times of chaos, sadness or trouble or catastrophes.
Yet I see selfies and bystanders who do nothing.
I see posts of long explanations of "its not about you" and this is why you should wear a mask. And though I agree, I think ..............but to "them" it IS and will always be about them, not others, that is the key reason for a lot of the madness. It is simply all about themselves. We all know you cannot fix stupid. And yet here we are, wasting our explanations and pleads. Never before have I realized that "helping others" can put me and my loved ones at risk, and some of the others I try to help really do not give a crap about me or my loved ones.
Twightlight zone much?
This month really sucked.
I have hope for everything and everyone. But I feel we are living in the extremes at the moment. And its easy to get sucked into the chaos and madness with my anger for the injustices and heartlessness.
A few weeks ago I had a talk with one of my cousins. She is an elementary school teacher here in T.O. She was prepping her students for Confirmation.
She talked about the 7 Deadly sins/ vices. I think many religions and philosophers have their own version, I think even Mahatma Gandhi has his own.
But for now the Christian version or Catholic version is what she reminded about.
Here is a list and the counteracting virtues.
Pride Humility
Envy Admiration
Anger Forgiveness,
Sloth Zeal, Diligence
Greed Generosity
Gluttony Temperance
Lust Chastity
I found it so interesting to look at any situation and distinguish what was the main vice involved. We talked more about pride and how it can be the root of all breakdowns in relationships.
If anything, the chaos of this pandemic and the craziness of this month has confirmed and help define what it means to be human....and separates those that are truly humane... apart from those that are of the surface, or only of themselves.
Ahhh, in this moment of mindfulness after my venting and with the terribleness of this month I still have seen the huge hearts of many and I am truly grateful. Like the life raft that keeps me afloat in this sea, I have a clearer vision of who I like to surround myself by.
----------------------------------
May the generous lights of this world, Tita HHD and EBR, rest in His Love.
Thursday, 14 May 2020
make it grow!
When I was living with my folks, my mom had about 100 orchids she looked after. She is pretty good with plants and seems to have a green thumb. Not like myself.
We had a basement that had a large shelf with grow lights, an upstairs bathroom with a skylight and a sun room off the kitchen filled with all of them.
She was very attentive and had a watering schedule and was checking for those weird white fuzzy bugs that they would sometimes get.
I remember sitting in the kitchen for breakfast as my mom would come downstairs, pass me at the kitchen table, go straight to her plants and greet them "oh good morning my babies!"
I'd sit there half jokingly "oh hellooooo , good morning to you too mom!?"
"oh yea hi, good morning."
har har.
Well like plants, people need attention to grow, relationships that you care about need attention to grow.
Mind you yea, there are times where she couldnt care for them when she was on vacation, so I tried my best to keep them alive while she was gone.
It IS work, and good thing she loved orchids. You can't just buy them have them bloom then throw them away. They are not dead. They are still alive. Just because the flowers fall away does not mean there will not be any that grow back ... though I hear with orchids its very hard. So you don't have to kill something that's still alive and doesn't have the pretty flowers... unless you are superficial like that... or just buy cut flowers for a vase instead.
So yes eventually, those that did not get the attention and care just simply died.
During this time of quarantine, when we cannot get to our regular routines and meetings and gatherings and we have to social distance, I find a few observations.... some of us are working out and getting in shape more than before because we have the time, others, are cooking and eating more or maybe the same as they did but not as much exercise so they are gaining weight. Some are eager to connect through different means and in some ways are getting closer than before, and others are the opposite. Some are finding time for the hobbies they did not have time for before and are becoming their own experts at it. Others are finding time to get things in order that they did not have time for before. Anyways, whatever we care about we put our attention to, and whatever we put our attention to will grow, and whatever we dont will not.
We had a basement that had a large shelf with grow lights, an upstairs bathroom with a skylight and a sun room off the kitchen filled with all of them.
She was very attentive and had a watering schedule and was checking for those weird white fuzzy bugs that they would sometimes get.
I remember sitting in the kitchen for breakfast as my mom would come downstairs, pass me at the kitchen table, go straight to her plants and greet them "oh good morning my babies!"
I'd sit there half jokingly "oh hellooooo , good morning to you too mom!?"
"oh yea hi, good morning."
har har.
Well like plants, people need attention to grow, relationships that you care about need attention to grow.
Mind you yea, there are times where she couldnt care for them when she was on vacation, so I tried my best to keep them alive while she was gone.
It IS work, and good thing she loved orchids. You can't just buy them have them bloom then throw them away. They are not dead. They are still alive. Just because the flowers fall away does not mean there will not be any that grow back ... though I hear with orchids its very hard. So you don't have to kill something that's still alive and doesn't have the pretty flowers... unless you are superficial like that... or just buy cut flowers for a vase instead.
So yes eventually, those that did not get the attention and care just simply died.
During this time of quarantine, when we cannot get to our regular routines and meetings and gatherings and we have to social distance, I find a few observations.... some of us are working out and getting in shape more than before because we have the time, others, are cooking and eating more or maybe the same as they did but not as much exercise so they are gaining weight. Some are eager to connect through different means and in some ways are getting closer than before, and others are the opposite. Some are finding time for the hobbies they did not have time for before and are becoming their own experts at it. Others are finding time to get things in order that they did not have time for before. Anyways, whatever we care about we put our attention to, and whatever we put our attention to will grow, and whatever we dont will not.
Friday, 1 May 2020
Same storm
From my perspective, I truely utterly hate this. The distance from loved ones and those that are dear to me and my family, those vulnerable people that are having a difficult time right now.
This shit ass fucken virus is taking alot from us. I feel for those at risk in the front lines and those that are physically vulnerable.
To those that say it is all B.S I would like to punch them in the face. Anyways. I have to keep a better perspective.
A colleague posted this in respects to opening up clinics vs closing clinics argument. I guess it says the same for everything that is going on right now.
WE ARE NOT IN THE SAME BOAT ...
I heard that we are all in the same boat, but it's not like that. We are in the same storm, but not in the same boat. Your ship could be shipwrecked and mine might not be. Or vice versa.
I heard that we are all in the same boat, but it's not like that. We are in the same storm, but not in the same boat. Your ship could be shipwrecked and mine might not be. Or vice versa.
For some, quarantine is optimal. A moment of reflection, of re-connection, easy in flip flops, with a cocktail or coffee. For others, this is a desperate financial & family crisis.
For some that live alone they're facing endless loneliness. While for others it is peace, rest & time with their mother, father, sons & daughters.
With some getting an increase in unemployment, or CERB, some are bringing in more money to their households than they were when they were working. Others are working many more hours for less money due to pay cuts or loss in sales.
Some families of 4 have received several thousands of dollars while other families of 4 saw $0.
Some were concerned about getting a certain candy for Easter while others were concerned if there would be enough bread, milk and eggs for the weekend.
Some want to go back to work because they don't qualify for unemployment or other wage replacement funds and are running out of money. Others are angry and want to lynch those who break the quarantine- even if following physical distancing rules.
Some are home spending 2-3 hours/day helping their child with online schooling while others are spending 2-3 hours/day to educate their children on top of a 10-12 hour workday.
Some have experienced the near death of the virus, some have already lost someone from it and some are not sure if their loved ones are going to make it. Others don't believe this is a big deal.
Some have faith in God and expect miracles during this 2020. Others say the worst is yet to come.
So, friends, we are not in the same boat. We are going through a time when our perceptions and needs are completely different.
Each of us will emerge, in our own way, from this storm. It is very important to see beyond what is seen at first glance. Not just looking, actually seeing.
We are all on different ships during this storm experiencing a very different journey.
Realize that and be kind to each other. Appreciate that others may not be getting through this as well as you may be.
Unknown author
SHARE THIS POST IF YOU WANT. IT'S A GOOD REMINDER ABOUT PERSPECTIVE.
Stay well, stay strong, stay kind.
Monday, 13 April 2020
Happy Easter Monday
So strange.
Yet wow, a lot of time to contemplate this situation and hopefully look at the over all picture of things.
I happened to watch the Live stream of the Good Friday Mass at St. Peters of the Passion of Christ mass.
It was on in the background while I was sewing.
This Homily stood out to me. It connected to our present state and had a good attempt at explaining the meaning behind it all.
Click on the transcript here, it is long but I do like it! I think many can relate to at least some of it and hopefully be a bit comforted.
"While he was painting frescoes in St. Paul’s Cathedral in London, the artist James Thornhill became so excited at a certain point about his fresco that he stepped back to see it better and was unaware he was about to fall over the edge of the scaffolding. A horrified assistant understood that crying out to him would have only hastened the disaster. Without thinking twice, he dipped a brush in paint and hurled it at the middle of the fresco. The master, appalled, sprang forward. His work was damaged, but he was saved."
Another thing that was Beautiful yesterday was Andrea Boccelli's Easter Concert for Hope.
It may not be everyone's thing but skip to minute 19:25 and on.....
Just seeing the drone shots of many big Italian cities ...then all the shots of the cities around the world.
This has really brought the world to a halt. Watching this part brought me to tears once again (as I do occasionally when I succumb to feeling overwhelmed by this) at the thought of the whole world stopping for this, together, and imagining how it would have sounded in Milan if they broadcast this concert loud into the empty streets.
-------------------
On another beautiful note:
Saturday I had the privilege once again to visit Positano, Italy!
(Btw my parents are from Philippines, but I feel like my soul is Italian! But even though my savory taste buds are Italian, my sweet taste buds are French).
I did a walking tour of Positano and it was amazing! Practically retracing my exact steps, I could feel the fresh sea air, the beaming sun on my skin, and it didn't kill my legs this time!
I did this all while folding laundry of course.
2011
2015
So lucky to have travelled here, twice. And I'm pretty thankful for all the places I have had the chance to experience. It was fun revisiting places I have been and sharing this with the bf. We revisited Costa Rica, and he took me to Spain, and I took him to Guatemala. ha !
Hope everyone had a wonderful Easter and is keeping safe and Healthy!
Yet wow, a lot of time to contemplate this situation and hopefully look at the over all picture of things.
I happened to watch the Live stream of the Good Friday Mass at St. Peters of the Passion of Christ mass.
It was on in the background while I was sewing.
This Homily stood out to me. It connected to our present state and had a good attempt at explaining the meaning behind it all.
Click on the transcript here, it is long but I do like it! I think many can relate to at least some of it and hopefully be a bit comforted.
"While he was painting frescoes in St. Paul’s Cathedral in London, the artist James Thornhill became so excited at a certain point about his fresco that he stepped back to see it better and was unaware he was about to fall over the edge of the scaffolding. A horrified assistant understood that crying out to him would have only hastened the disaster. Without thinking twice, he dipped a brush in paint and hurled it at the middle of the fresco. The master, appalled, sprang forward. His work was damaged, but he was saved."
Another thing that was Beautiful yesterday was Andrea Boccelli's Easter Concert for Hope.
It may not be everyone's thing but skip to minute 19:25 and on.....
Just seeing the drone shots of many big Italian cities ...then all the shots of the cities around the world.
This has really brought the world to a halt. Watching this part brought me to tears once again (as I do occasionally when I succumb to feeling overwhelmed by this) at the thought of the whole world stopping for this, together, and imagining how it would have sounded in Milan if they broadcast this concert loud into the empty streets.
-------------------
On another beautiful note:
Saturday I had the privilege once again to visit Positano, Italy!
(Btw my parents are from Philippines, but I feel like my soul is Italian! But even though my savory taste buds are Italian, my sweet taste buds are French).
I did a walking tour of Positano and it was amazing! Practically retracing my exact steps, I could feel the fresh sea air, the beaming sun on my skin, and it didn't kill my legs this time!
I did this all while folding laundry of course.
2011
2015
So lucky to have travelled here, twice. And I'm pretty thankful for all the places I have had the chance to experience. It was fun revisiting places I have been and sharing this with the bf. We revisited Costa Rica, and he took me to Spain, and I took him to Guatemala. ha !
Hope everyone had a wonderful Easter and is keeping safe and Healthy!
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