Asteism

Another new word for me, dammit, not in my Jossipedia files once again.....


I had a patient come in to my clinic on Friday. I was trying to figure him out from the start. A bit of annoyance that I was 10 minutes late to getting him into his apt (due to the patient before him needing more time); a bit of arrogance or false sense of "whatever I don't care for the details" kind of attitude, impatience, then as I talked to him more he became more willing to listen to my advice and became a bit more calm. Regardless.... during the small talk in between he said:

" Oh I thought you would be French. Your name is French you know"
And the one comment that bugged me sometime after he left, and still now, was:
"So both your parents are Filipino? That is interesting. I thought that maybe you would be some sort of mix. I hope I am not insulting you when I say this (clue that he is fully aware that it will be an insult) but you do not look like you are filipino. You are pretty. I would not have guessed that you are filipino."

All I said in response was "Gez I hope you are not insulting me.." not taking a stance either way....

You know those times you want to kick yourself for things you think you should have done way after the fact? I should have set him straight and called him out on this. Insulting a whole entire culture and one that I belong to. He needs to see his stereotype or whatever ideas he has of it are wrong, and that is an insult more than any compliment he ignorantly thought he was giving.

Anyhow definition of Asteism :

Correspondingly, a backhanded (or left-handed)compliment, or asteism, is an insult that is disguised as, or accompanied by, a compliment, especially in situations where the belittling or condescension is intentional. Examples of backhanded complimentsinclude: "I did not expect you to ace that exam.