positive reminder

90 yr old pt: " a few months ago I set a goal that I would like to live to 100. I feel that if I set that goal and say it, the more likely it is to happen."

He went on to tell me that he told his goal to his dentist. His dentist said that his goal was a good one and that "there are a lot of 65 yr olds who just give up. If they are told they need a crown or a root canal or a filling, they respond with 'Why bother, I'll be dead soon anyways..' ".

This was such an interesting statement by my patient today because this morning I had a 64 yr old pt say to me that she is going to make an appointment to see her family doctor so she can fill out the forms for her to get a Scooter.
At the moment, she is able bodied, a bit over weight, and has some arthritis that is not debilitating (Osteoarthritis not Rhematoid).
I told her that often times I see pts that are able bodied and working to be more healthy, trying to lose weight etc, but feel that they need a scooter to give them that extra help. And as little as two months later I see a drastic decline in their health since they are not walking as much and exercise less. The desire is there but it becomes that much harder to achieve once they get a scooter, which they do not need.
She has been grappling with the idea of getting one because - right now she has coverage (I can go on about how certain systems promote unhealthiness than health), and that she looks at it as preparing for when she possibly cannot walk anymore due to her arthritis....

I suggested to the patient "Why not prepare to be healthy in the future, rather than preparing to be unhealthy." 

Sportsmanship

noun

noun: sportsmanship

1. fair and generous behavior or treatment of others, especially in a sports contest.

   "he displayed great sportsmanship in defeat"

I learned a bit about this during my dive back into playing squash a lot lately.
Thankful that I am surrounded by so many examples of this.
Hope to emulate these.

Equality

There’s a difference between:

Equality of outcome

And 

Equality of opportunity 

One make a person responsible for their own efforts and actions. This gives a person purpose and allows a person to grow. The other does the opposite.

Take a guess which is which.

Empathy

Dictionary

em·pa·thy

ˈempəTHē/

noun

1. the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

So, where does this ability come from?
This question has been on my mind lately.
Is it learned? By experience....if you go through the same pain or hurt then you can recognize it in others?
Is it taught? By others telling you how they feel and by you caring about that person and trying to understand emotionally what they are going through?

Why so many questions about empathy?

Well some people simply don't have it.

So much so, I am beginning to think that it is an actual gene people are lacking.

If the hurt/pain is not happening to them, well good luck with the fact that you are dealing with it, not them.

Cases in point:

Someone hurt you. You tell them by expressing your displeasure, or being mad or sad or upset or even simply telling them that they hurt you.
They say "SOOOOORRRRRY then!" like they were forced or coerced into saying something they didn't feel they needed to because they do not believe you. And they are just saying it so that this awkward, uncomfortable feeling you are putting ON THEM will stop.

It is still about them.
No understanding about how the other person feels.
No empathy there.

Or punishment for doing harm to others. When robbers get caught. SORRRYYY and maybe even some tears. But only because they got caught. Not because they have empathy for how they affected other people's lives.

Or expressing how you are bummed that your vacation is ruined by a deadly typhoon while people that live in that area are losing homes or being injured or dying.

I'm seeing a lot of this lately. No empathy, no understanding of other people's feelings.
Very much part of this ever growing ME society.
MY feelings, not your feelings.
Only until people start actually caring about other people than themselves will they have the ability to have empathy.

But yea, whiners, and people who deem themselves helpless but they have full capacity and abilities to help themselves, I have no empathy for....but that's another post.

Jordan B. Peterson | Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)

Elections 2019

What is happening?

I can't..

I just...
Where am I....

When is the next election?!

Cause my butt is sore from sitting by this campfire singing kumbya, wearing flower crowns and breathing in this smoke all day....

Can we start running a country already?!

Political Correctness.....

"...I'm standing here with someone who I have differences with, in terms of politics, precisely because I think all this has got to stop. This rage, resentment, hostility, intolerance. Above all, this 'with us or against us' certainty.

The Grand Canyon has opened up in our world, the fistula, the crack grows wider every day. Neither can hear a word that the other shrieks, and nor do they want to. While these armies and propagandists in the country wars clash, down below in the enormous space between the two sides, the people of the world try to get along with their lives, eternally baffled, bored, and betrayed by the horrible noises and explosions all around.

I think it is time for this toxic, binary, zero sum madness to stop before we destroy ourselves.

......

I think one of the greatest human failings, is to prefer to be right, than to be effective. Political Correctness is always obsessed with thinking about how right it is than how effective it might be.

.....

I'm prepared to entertain the opportunity that Political correctness will bring us more tolerance and a better world. But I am not sure.


 ' One of the painful things of our time, is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision. Let doubt prevail' "

- Stephen Fry